An old fire

How does the spark die out so quickly when it was ignited not long ago? How does the rain come falling down in the midst of the heat? I still wonder how we’re not the same.

It’s weird. I care and express passion. I look and I search until I’m burned out. Then, the sun becomes too hot and the clouds are heavy. I can’t live like this. I still care but caring becomes a burden. The warmth of my bed is so comforting, why must I care to do anything at all?  I just want to lay here and let the days pass by without showers or food or human contact. Until, one day, I’m so tired of not caring that I have no choice but to bring myself back to life. A life that will inevitably lead me down the same path, the same cycle, again and again.

The fire will ignite and the passion will drive me a few steps ahead of where I’ve been standing. Then, I’ll stop in place and crawl into a ball because caring has become a burden again. Wanting to live and to continue living… this world asks for too much.


Love,   Alyazya


5 thoughts on “An old fire

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