Slowing down

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When the weather was most turbulent, I began to sink into my own thoughts. Perhaps, it was speaking to me, angered by my lack of self-care. After all, I’ve been distracting myself by stacking up my schedule with activities beyond my human capacity.

I’ve always been uncomfortable with solitude and slow movement, but yesterday I took a moment to myself. Sitting on the rocks by the sea, staring at the waves that move under the mercy of the wind. They crashed into the rocks and each time I thought to myself, does it hurt? Would the waters be the same if the wind was always present? I don’t know. Maybe, they’ll grow tired. Maybe, the rocks will crumble under the force.

I’m both the wind and water, blowing myself in every direction, hitting the rocks and backing up just to come crashing again. I never thought I’d get hurt in the process. If anything, I believed I was invincible, forever able to carry on, moving, breaking through everything that comes my way. I never thought I’d ever stop for anything, but my water was no longer able to handle my wind’s persistence.

It’s not a crime to take a moment for yourself, to heal, to reenergize, to breathe. Yet, our fast-paced world makes it seem like one. They say a few moments of peace don’t harm you, but a few moments of peace are a few moments wasted. I feel like if I don’t keep pushing forward, I’ll never be able to achieve what everyone else is. Perhaps, I’m the kind of person who needs to work twice as hard to get the same results as my peers. So, how will I be great if my body can’t cope with stress?

 

Love,  Alyazya


20 thoughts on “Slowing down

  1. “I’m both the wind and water,” gave me chills. I think we have to accept that the air of society is polluted with conflicting, inconsistent, downright toxic and skewed messages. Only the few are “successful” Because or you can only be successful IF.
    Be a successful and whole you, and let those goals fit you not the other way around.

    Where does the wind go? Nobody knows, but it’s There.

    -Neru

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Your body needs your mind working properly. Peace and stillness re-centre the mind, so must be good for the body. But, no, not too much (especially at my age, which is probably yours multiplied). Too much stillness clogs the arteries and stiffens the joints, then everything grinds to a halt.

    Liked by 2 people

  3. This is just beautiful…makes me ponder too if my rest mode is a waste of time. I have been taking an almost a year off of school due to mental breakdown, and I often think about the moments wasted, what I could have accomplished if I didn’t have to take a year off. But my brain shouts for a rest, and my body too. I think it is just right to slow down. Right now, I am just posting poems in my blog while I’m resting.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. “I feel like if I don’t keep pushing forward, I’ll never be able to achieve what everyone else is. Perhaps, I’m the kind of person who needs to work twice as hard to get the same results as my peers. So, how will I be great if my body can’t cope with stress?”
    The whole post was so very beautiful, but this part here resonated with me on a whole different level. Thank you, it makes me feel a little less alone to know that there are others out there too who have similar struggles and it’s just not me alone. Thank you. And I hope that everything goes well for you. xx

    Liked by 1 person

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